December 9, 2010

art card #282
watercolor, pencil, ink
(c) 2010 Amanda Millay Hughes

Back from two whirlwind days in New York, I am making a cup of tea and thinking about the things I learned while I was there.

First, and perhaps foremost, I am beginning to understand how to navigate the underworld of the Metro. Now, before I go too far into this discussion, I do know that everyone in NYC who rides the Metro thinks that it is relatively easy and everyone who never rides the Metro thinks it is impossible. I fall somewhere in the middle. When I am with the children (Emily and Will are both masters of the Metro game plan!), I don't have to notice the finer points of this endeavor - they do it for me. For example, I do not have to pay attention to which side of the platform I should be waiting on, whether this is an express or local train, and whether where I want to go is on this train line. I just enjoy their company, note the many passengers who I think could teach a thing or two about Buddhist meditation to recalcitrant students, myself included, and ride along. But, alone - well that is a different story. Having traveled through many of the major cities of Europe without the benefit of a common language, I have never felt as lost as I have sometimes, oftentimes, felt in the New York City Metro.

But this time, I took my map, and read carefully, and noted where I was and where I needed to go, bought my pass, boarded my trains and made it to my destinations on time and without drama. I feel totally victorious.

I am even willing to admit that I liked it - this feeling of independence and mobility...this knowing that I could get anywhere (almost) if I was willing to walk a little on either end of the dark tunnels and stairs and noise and cold.

I do think that the New York Transit authority should put compass roses at the entrance/exits of all the subway stops so that no one has to stand there like an idiot on a cloudy day trying to figure out which way is west....but that's just me.

Second, I learned that the Christmas windows are as beautiful as all the movies and the hype suggest. Bergdorf Goodman in particular...oh you should see them! These extraordinary windows with giant maps and antique cameras and swans and gorgeous animals and pretty things all presented in a sort of 1940's fantasy of the Grand Tour! I loved it....marvelous! And the lights! Everywhere lights and the dusting of cold (it was very cold).

I went to Trinity Wall Street to see my dear friend, the Reverend Mark Bozutti-Jones. We talked, and then rushed from his office to the church for the Eucharist at 12:05, then off to lunch and up to see his apartment...and the balcony that overlooks the Hudson River. Standing with my back to the glass door, at just about 10:00 on the clock face of my vision - there is the statue of liberty and straight across the river the Colgate clock. Remarkable. A little boy from Jamaica now with a million dollar view of the Hudson River.

I saw the children, made my way to the MET for my visit with Rothko - hate to go to New York without a visit to see these paintings - they break my heart; I find them so beautiful. Walked through an exhibition of Steiglitz, Steichen, and Strand. Loved it. Remembered again how fortunate we are to own the lamp housing from Steichen's darkroom (Thanks, Dad). Even in the cold, even fighting off a cold...I loved it.

But I love being home even more.

Do you remember that Dad used to say:"New York is a terrible place to visit and a wonderful place to live?" I think I understand this now more than I did years ago. When you don't live there, you have no where to go when you are tired and cold - no where but into a taxi, or a restaurant for another overpriced cup of coffee, or into another museum or a library (I have done all these things in the last few years in between meetings with donors). But when you live there you have all of that - all that excellence, all those people, all those metro stops, all those questions - AND a place to settle in among your own things... your own coffee... your own art...

Emily told me recently that she read a blog - or maybe a print article - that suggested if you want to live in New York you must ask yourself three questions:

1) Do you want to be surrounded by the very best?
2) Do you want to be the best in your field?
3) Do you want to be happy?

The first two questions must be answered with a resounding yes or New York will exhaust you. And the third must be answered with a quiet no...being happy cannot be the most important thing if you want to live in the City.

The questions have engaged me and I hope I am remembering them correctly because if I am, I can answer yes to all three AND live in North Carolina.

I do want to be surrounded by the very best - but the best I choose is friends and family. Grandbabies and companions, sweet Kirsten and her extraordinary family...they are the best and they are here.

I would like to be the best in my field - but my field is not so much professionally fixed in a location, as it is personal, relational, a kind of wanderlust and romp through art and ideas, and that, as Dad also used to say, you can do anywhere that Fed Ex delivers. Today, he would say "anywhere with a laptop and wifi!" And I have that here.

Finally, I do want to be happy - not all the time silly, giddy. But I do value that joyful gratitude that overtakes me sometimes - and yes, it feels like happiness and that is good enough.

So, I am very glad to be home - with my tea in my cup, my quiet office, my little house wrapped around me. The lights are on the Christmas tree.

and of course, I wish you were here...

Always yours
Amanda

PS. You can see the windows at the Bergdorf Goodman Blog